and don't forget your vitamins

The little hanging paper tag suspended from my teabag
reads Feeling Down? Hot Liquids Bring Relief
And I can't help but bite my bottom lip in guilt:
Stacking laundry lists, and yet
Regardless-
All I can seem to bleed from my swollen mind, right now
Is the thought that I could really just use
A different kind of Hot Liquids
Than the herbal medley seeping in its porcelain chamber
...Tea is delicious, don't get me wrong
And as much as it makes me feel at home within myself,
It lacks a certain intimacy

The kind your skin soaks up and revels in
After you've wrapped yourself tightly in (and tied a bow on the head with a flourish)
Another's body language (read: fluids)


Oh, I could get more graphic, believe me..
if I succumbed to the whims of my primal drumbeat ponderings
no details would be spared.
BUT no need for me to share the state of my hormones currently,
it's late and I'm frustrated with my own contradictory desires and urges
Wanting nothing more than to crawl under my candy comforter naked and set up shop,
content and alone and soft skinned,
eyelids lacking any preoccupations or obligations
Nothing but the sound of my own deep chested breaths to lull me
into still waters.
And yet...
there is this big, fat,
bulky, throbbing
image
sitting in the corner of my consciousness
Of something like darkened, honest eyes
shining with awareness and with nothing to hide,
grabbing me mid glimpse,
-caught me.

I'd like to look at you a little longer,
but I'm always late in this game anyway..
So i'll just forget to remind myself exactly how much dirty brevity
can hit the spot
(X marks it, you called it)
Lately I have been for lack of hustle
and in this day and age,
often times it seems far too hopeless anyway,
we're all left feeling like
the only solution to the tug of war
is to live constantly
one deep.
And maybe it is.




An unshakeable connection,
soft heated flesh in the night
a laugh that sits deep within my bones and embeds itself there,
okay. These are all nice, too.
Hey, longing....fuck you.
I don't have time anymore.
HotLiquids
BringRelief

[i need to push myself more.]

traditional medicinals for the soul
if it ain't broke...
don't fix it.


we're all waiting,
in between the lines.